Identical
by PaigeySama
Summary: What happens when Hikaru gets drunk and decides to "play" with Kaoru. Will Kaoru take things to seriously only to be hurt in the end? OC character thats not important, WARNING: twincest, KaoKyo pairing for like 3 seconds and KaoTono pairing for a bit :D
1. Chapter 1

* * *

I don't own Ouran High School Host Club. If I did though, *smirk* Hikaru and Kaoru would be.... nevermind ;)  
Well, enjoy people. Yes this story is quite sad  
If you like Ellen Hopkins, You'll understand the title and the first paragraph :D

Pairings: Hikaru and Kaoru, very minor Kaoru and Kyoya, Hikaru and Haruhi (Because I HATE that couple with a burning passion! .)

I'm done stalling, ENJOY!

* * *

When I look into a mirror, it is his face I see. His right is my left, my right is his left, unblemished. We are exact opposites, Hikaru and me. Mirror-image identical twins. One egg, one sperm, one zygote, divided, sharing one complete set of genetic markers. On the outside we are the same but on the inside, we're different.

Kaoru's POV

_I just don't understand. How can I remember in detail of all of last nights events but Hikaru just doesn't remember. I don't think it's because he doesn't WANT to remember. I think it's more of the alcohol's fault. Yes, I remember quite well..._

Looking at him sleeping soundlessly everything comes back. I trace the outline of his lips softly with my fingertips. Good thing he's a heavy sleeper.

His sleeping form was simply beautiful. Yeah, we're identical twins but, there's certain faces that he could make that just seem so natural with him.

_Hikaru._

I pulled my legs off of the bed and glanced at the clock. It read 3:54 am. It's a Thursday.

I pulled on my clothes, something told me to regret everything that happened just a few hours ago but it was the drunken slur that moaned my name to make me completely forget about it. Yeah, call me crazy, call me sick, call me twisted, I don't care. I'm in love with Hikaru Hitachiin. My twin brother. But then again you already knew that eh?

I could feel the pulsing pain in my rectum from Hikaru's drunken thrusts. I bit my lip. It was actually quite painful.

Since I only had a little buzz I wasn't completely out of it. I don't know how he talked me into such an outrageous stunt but he did. What can I say? I did it for Hikaru. He wanted it so I gave it to him.

I rubbed my temples. Though the experience was nearly pleasurable there was a slight tingling of pleasure. Hikaru just couldn't last long enough to get to it fully.

I got up and walked to the bathroom and sighed as I gazed around then decided to shower. Even though it made me feel much more content knowing I had Hikaru's lips and body against my skin before, I'll just get over it.

I'm just noticing all of the love bites I have over me. There are tiny ones on my neck but most of them were on my shoulders and chest. Man that guy goes all out.

After completely cleaning myself off I dried up and went back to the bed. I didn't bother getting dressed. I was much to tired. It was only 4:37 am. I still had a little while to sleep.

* * *

Waking up was a disaster. I was kicked off of the bed and slammed myself on the floor which hurt like hell. I glared at Hikaru's sleeping form and quickly got dressed then sat back on the bed after pushing him off of the other side.

How strange that he stayed asleep.

This guy is a brick.

I glanced over at the clock and saw that it indeed was nearly time for him to get up anyway. I slightly smiled. Even though I'm kind of angry at Hikaru right now I wanted to see him up. Last night was our first kiss, and our first lots of things. Maybe I'd get a good morning kiss?

I placed him back on the bed then shook his shoulder.

"Hikaru." I said softly and he grumbled. "Hikaru, you have to get ready for school. Hikaru." I simply loved the way his name felt on my lips and tongue.

"I'm up Kaoru." He grumbled and opened his eyes tiredly then yawned. I couldn't help but smile at his perfection. He was cute when he woke up, I'll give him that. Actually I'll give him anything he wants. As long as my twin brother is happy so am I.

"Now why the hell am I naked?" He asked looking down and I blushed and my mouth dropped slightly.

"What do you mean?" I asked and furrowed my brow. "You don't remember?"

"No, I have a huge headache though. What happened last night?" He curiously tilted his head and I sighed and stood up and walked out of the room. I couldn't believe it. Last night I gave up everything... And he doesn't remember a thing.

How could that be possible...?

I felt like punching something but I didn't. I kept my posture. I just sat down on the stairs and could nearly hear the violin play. Me and Hikaru are practically inseparable but right now I just didn't want to see him.

Truth be told, I didn't want to see myself either. Could it be the resemblance. The fact that if I look in the mirror it'll seem that my hair is parted the way that Hikaru's is? I just don't know. I couldn't tell you.

"Kaoru." Hikaru called and then finally saw my sitting position. Honestly I felt like the Lonely Prince. I need my mushrooms... "Kaoru there you are."

"..." I couldn't answer, I wouldn't answer. I wanted Hikaru to remember everything that happened last night. But since he didn't, then might as well act like it never happened right?

"Kaoru, what happened last night, could you tell me?" Hikaru asked and sat next to me and I turned to him and decided to lie. Lie to my brother, my lover, my life. I lied.

"I guess you don't remember because of the alcohol. But it was nothing... You were just sweating and I guess you were having a bad dream so I undressed you. Sorry, I was just so scared. I didn't know what was going to happen. I thought you were sick. I apologize.. Hikaru." I lied. I felt disgusting but he sort of looked a tad bit shocked. He hugged me tightly.

"I assure you that I was fine. I don't even remember it so obviously it wasn't that important huh?" He grinned and with that line he could've ripped out my heart.

It kept repeating itself in my head.

_I don't even remember it so obviously it wasn't that important huh?_

".... I guess not." I declared and stood up. He tilted his head slightly.

"Kaoru, you seem upset. Is something bothering you?" He asked and again, I lied. I smiled cutely.

"Oh no, nothing is wrong. Just... Worried." And by worried I mean heartbroken.

"It's ok, it was no big deal." He finally said and hugged me again before going to get changed into his uniform.

And I'd wait for him.

* * *

"Kaoru-kun, what's wrong?" Honey asked and I turned to him with a smile.

"Nothing is wrong, why does everyone say something's wrong with me when nothing is wrong with me?" I asked with that horribly fake smile of mine. Honey's happy expression faded quite quickly.

"You don't have to lie to me Kaoru-kun." He said softly and my expression dropped a bit.

"Honey-senpai..." I whispered and he smiled cutely.

"Want some cake?" He offered and I shook my head.

"No thank you." I said and turned around.

"If you want to talk you could always come to me, okay?" Honey smiled widely and I turned and nodded and gave him a reassuring smile.

"I'm fine Honey-senpai, really."

* * *

"I'm really grateful for everything you did last night. You were there for me when I was breaking through a fever." Hikaru said and tilted up my chin. Blushing I turned the other way.

"Hikaru, it was nothing. I simply undressed you because I didn't want you to overheat." I said bashfully.

"Why don't you let me undress you Kaoru?" He purred and I had small tears in my eyes.

"Your really embarrassing me in front of these girls Hikaru." I said coyly and all of the girls around us started squealing.

If only he knew the truth.

Why am I to afraid of telling him?

He'd find out sooner or later right? He should...

What if he rejects what happened and wants to get different rooms or something? What if he'd leave me alone? I need Hikaru.

"Kaoru are you ok?" Hikaru asked, sounding more staged than anything we've practiced.

"I'm fine Hikaru." I said and got up and left. I honestly had no idea where I was going but obviously somewhere to sort things out. I just wish I had someone to talk to.

"And just where do you think your going?" Kyoya asked chuckling and my eyebrow twitched. Anyone BUT him.

"I'm going for a walk, do you have a problem?" I snapped and turned to him and he raised his eyebrow.

"You DO realize your going to cause the profits to go incredibly lower. Right now you left Hikaru alone with 5 girls who want to see brotherly love." Kyoya said and pushed up his glasses.

"Well they could find someone else for that right now, ok?" I hardly noticed my voice cracking. I didn't even notice the tears until I turned around and ran off and see myself in the reflection of the fountain. "This isn't staged Hikaru, so why does it feel like it is?"

* * *

~~~No one's POV in Music Room 3~~~

"Kyoya-senpai where'd Kaoru go?" Haruhi asked in her usual monotone voice.

"He had other things to do right now." Kyoya said carefully. He didn't know if he should let the whereabouts of Kaoru be let out but than again, who wouldn't see him? He was in front of the school sitting on a fountain.

"Where's that?" Hikaru snapped angrily. "Somewhere more important than with me?" Well it was a good thing all of the girls left.

"It seems that Kaoru is very upset, why? Who knows. But I'm pretty sure he wants to be alone right now. But if you don't want to take my advice..." Kyoya pointed. "He's sitting at the fountain."

"Bye." Hikaru dashed off and Kyoya sighed.

"What's going on with those two?" Honey asked curiously and Mori shrugged.

"This better not be a fake fight again." Haruhi mumbled.

"No, they seem to be in true despair! We must help them!" Tamaki said being completely over dramatic.

"The twins should sort this out on their own senpai." Haruhi stated and Tamaki went in his emo corner and began to plant mushrooms.

"I think that's a GREAT idea Tamaki!!" Honey cheered happily immediately bringing Tamaki out of his depressed stage and onto his happy-go-lucky stage.

"Thank you Honey! Now I need to talk to mommy so hold on a second..."

* * *

~~~Kaoru's POV~~~

I continued looking at the reflection of myself slightly dreaming that it was Hikaru. But I knew it wasn't so why did I continue to hope?

I added my own liquid to the fountain. My tears dropped in and I shook my head and closed my eyes.

"KAORU!" I heard Hikaru scream and I turned to him and quickly wiped the tears from my eyes.

"Hikaru." I whispered and he finally got to me and took a second to catch his breath.

"Why did you run off like that?" He asked and my heart broke and I jumped up and hugged him. Even if he doesn't remember it's ok. I still love him.

"I'm sorry. I'll never do it again." I promised.

Where did all of the fan girls come from?

"Good Kaoru, you had me worried." Hikaru kissed my forehead tenderly and my face heated up and I smiled softly.

_Hikaru._

* * *

This is my first Ouran High School Host Club story, PLEASE review. It would mean a lot to me if you did. :)


	2. Chapter 2

I DON'T know if you knew this... and it MAY become a shock.... But I don't own Ouran High School Host Club. I know... I know... BIG SHOCKER there. Sorry my fans.

lol well, I'd like to thank Ashley for her fucked up review :D lmao jk and thank you SuikaChan555 for her nice review :D

The only people I own in this story is Dani... Who originally wasn't even supposed to have a part but thats ok xD

enjoy! (This chapter depresses me lol)

* * *

I know I forgave Hikaru, but I can't help but be mad at him. Why is he so blind? It's just no fair at all. I love him more than I should.

I turned to face him in the limo. Just to steal a quick glance.

"Well you're awfully quiet." Hikaru stated kind of obnoxiously.

"Sorry, I'm just out of it I suppose." I admitted and he glared at me.

"I can't believe how much you lied to me Kaoru." He barked and the car stopped and he got out of it. My expression dropped.

"Hikaru! What do you mean?" I called and he stopped walking and turned to me with a dangerous look.

"I'm your twin brother, do you think I don't know when something is bothering you? Huh? I know you lied to me today. I'm not entirely sure on what but I know you did and that's what hurts the most Kaoru!" He yelled and I blinked and looked down at my feet.

"Hikaru--"

"Save it Kaoru." He growled and stomped off.

* * *

Right now I was reliving bliss. I was under a few trees that I remember very well sitting under with my lovely brother Hikaru. I know he's angry at me, he has a right to be but just think about it, he took away my innocents and doesn't even know it happened. What's fair about that?

"What's wrong Master Kaoru." One of the maids asked and I looked up and shook my head.

"Nothing. I just wish to be left alone." I sighed and she smiled somewhat.

"Are you sure Master Kaoru? I know when your upset you usually talk to Master Hikaru about what's bothering you. But it seems that you two are in a predicament. If you need me to, I could stand in as a replacement for the time being if you need to talk to me." She smiled cutely.

"What's your name again?" I asked with my eyebrow raised.

"My name Master Kaoru? That's Daniana. Ana or Dani for short." She introduced and I pulled my legs to my chest and let my chin rest on my knees.

"Tell me about yourself Dani." I said and she smiled slightly and sat down in front of me.

"I'm 23, I moved here from America and I've seen situations much like your in before. My mother was a politician and my father was a lawyer. I too had a twin." She said and that perked my interest.

"What was she like?" I asked and she giggled.

"Well much like you and Hikaru we were identical and inseparable. But as you see, we finally split ways. It's kind of funny... I've had all of those chances and never said a thing. I do regret that the most. She's married now. Well Master Kaoru, I'm sorry to leave you but it seems I'm being summoned." Dani turned her head to be met with the head maid of the house calling her from the sliding door. "If you ever need to talk, I've been through these things. I have a twin. Talk to me." She said and got up leaving me alone.

Daniana was pretty cute. She was pale with long brown hair and green eyes. She had a birthmark near the corner of her left eye and she was kind of short and slender.

But I wouldn't chose her over my Hikaru dearest even if he wouldn't choose me over Haruhi.

I know he likes her. It's pretty obvious. It breaks my heart to pieces but it's... obvious....

_It's kind of funny... I've had all of those chances and never said a thing. I do regret that the most. She's married now. _

Could she be hinting something I have to do?

I stood up and looked up at the house and dashed inside and looked for my twin. I couldn't stand him being angry at me anymore.

When I got to our room he wasn't there. Where was he?

I sighed. Of coarse he wasn't there. Why would he be?

I laid on the bed and closed my eyes. I knew I wanted to be with Hikaru but for some reason my energy was completely drained. So I fell asleep.

_Hikaru, why are you doing this to me? My heart is breaking because of it. Why do you like Haruhi. I could do things for you that she never would._

"Hikaru." I whimpered in my sleep and a tear ran down my cheek.

No sooner later did I feel arms wrap around my waist and pull me towards them. My eyes opened and I turned to see Hikaru. He was calm looking but he looked drunk. My expression softened. That's when he started kissing down my neck.

My eyes stung. How much longer was I going to let him get away with this?

He turned me over and I could see the lust in his eyes. He was drunk alright.

He pressed his lips to mine hungrily and I sat there and took it.

My name is Kaoru Hitachiin. My twin brother is Hikaru Hitachiin. I'm in love with him but he'll never know.

I closed my eyes and kissed back. I wanted him like this. I really did.

I just wanted him to be sober.

"Will you remember?" I asked softly when he pulled away. He paused. I didn't know what he was thinking. I do remember that glare though.

"..You.. Sayin... Th-at... I-I'll for-get or sumthin?" He slurred and I turned my head and nodded.

"You already did." I whispered and felt his soft hands pull off my shirt.

He kissed down my chest, fondled me. I wanted to moan, but I couldn't help but want to cry too.

The thing that hurt me the most you might ask?

Hikaru slammed himself inside of me roughly. I yelped and closed my eyes tightly. But this brought us closer right?

Wrong.

"Haruhi.." He moaned.

(**Message from Paige: That was the depressing part BTW lol**)

* * *

I was curled up in the bathtub crying my eyes out. It wasn't on. I was fully clothed. I couldn't be near Hikaru right now. After he finished up he nuzzled against me. I was shaking. I couldn't believe that just happened. My heart ached more than it ever could. Or should. Someone knocked at the door.

"Occupied!" I yelled and they knocked again. "Occupied!" I yelled louder.

"I'm aware Master Kaoru." I heard Dani say softly. "Do you need someone to talk to?" She asked and normally I'd say no but I NEEDED someone right now.

I jumped out of the tub and opened the door. Her expression dropped and she looked at me closer. The only light was a nightlight that was in the bathroom.

"Master Kaoru, are you ok?" She asked and I ushered her in and closed the door.

We sat on the floor... Well she did, I laid on the floor curled up. She pulled me closer to her and stroked my hair as I cried. I've never felt so calm before.

"Master Kaoru." She whispered tenderly. I looked up at her and she pursed her lips. "What happened with you and Master Hikaru?" She asked and I looked away from her with tears blindly running down my face. The only thing I could think of was having her talk to me.

"Dani, what was your sister like?" I asked quietly and she smiled.

"My sister was almost like me but she was much more demanding. Much like Master Hikaru." She said softly and it broke my heart to hear his name. I let out more tears. "What does my sister have to do with anything?"

"Were you two close?" I asked close to sobbing.

"Yes Master Kaoru, we were very close indeed. We told each other everything and we were always there for each other. We never lied to each other and we were blunt with one another." She admitted and I nodded.

"Did you love her?" I asked with more tears running down my face.

"Did I love her? Of coarse I loved her. She was my twin sister." Dani whispered and I looked at her and she stopped stroking my hair.

"No. Did you love her." I asked more stern and her expression faded and she put on a sad smile.

"So this is what it's about." She finally came out with and I glared.

"Answer my question." I snapped and she smiled at me.

"Yes Master Kaoru. I loved her, _very_ much." She pulled my head onto her lap like a mother would it's child and stroked my hair. She hummed as she did it making me tired. I liked Dani. She didn't ask major questions but she knew everything already.

I was starting to fall asleep and I loved how she sort of rocked herself back and forth giving me the impression of being rocked as well.

And so my eyes closed.

* * *

I woke up in the same position I was in before. Dani didn't leave my side. In fact she was the one that woke me. She had her cell phone opened.

"It's time to get ready for school Master Kaoru." She said and my eyes widened.

"Dani, you stayed with me for 4 hours??" I asked surprised and she smiled.

"Master Kaoru you should take a shower. There's fresh towels." She said and got up when I moved my head. "I'm here if you need me."

Wow, Dani.

I smiled and turned on the shower when she left.

Was this finally a true friend? I wouldn't let anyone else have her. Hikaru could have Haruhi all he wanted but I will have Dani. I don't like her in _that_ way, no! But she seems more like an older sister or a mom to me than anything else.

I digress.

* * *

"Kaoru, why wont you talk to me?" Hikaru groaned and I turned to him and my heart broke more.

"Why bother? I'm not Haruhi. Isn't that who you'd MUCH rather talk to? Spend time with?" I turned my head and walked downstairs to get breakfast. But... I didn't eat anything. I stared at it. Hikaru was glaring at me from across the table and that's when Dani walked in.

"Master Kaoru, you should really eat." She said with a smile and I couldn't help but be confused. Me and Hikaru were sitting in completely different seats than we used to.

"How'd you know it was me?" I asked and she smiled.

"Master Kaoru, I of all people should know how to tell twins apart. After all, I am one. So eat up, don't be upset." She said and walked off and me and Hikaru stared at her while she walked away.

"So that's what it is, is it? Your ignoring me to get close to _her_?" Hikaru snapped and I glared at him.

"Oh you WISH it was like that. I'm ignoring you because your so insensitive!" I yelled.

"Boys! Boys!" Our mom yelled and we turned to her.

"Mom?" We questioned in unison.

"Yes, I'm back from France for now. Stop arguing at the breakfast table." She ordered and both of us stood up and glared at each other.

"Fine we'll argue elsewhere." We said together and stormed out of the room. Neither of us ate.

"Just tell me WHY your being so jealous all of a sudden!! You never cared that I liked Haruhi before!" He shouted and I stayed quiet.

"Really now?" I said and walked out of the house.

_Hikaru, I've always loved you more than a brother should love his brother. I just hadn't really taken it into consideration until me and you shared that night together. It made me feel like you actually loved me back. But throughout the whole time you were thinking of Haruhi.. That isn't fair... Is it?_

* * *

Class seemed to be really quiet with us not talking. Usually we were the main focus but we just refused to talk. Well. To each other. I honestly didn't talk to anyone... Hikaru talked to Haruhi however.

He was either doing that because he wanted to or he wanted to annoy me. Whatever he did, it definitely annoyed me.

"It seems were down two loving twins.." Kyoya said while looking at me and I sighed.

"That sucks for you, doesn't it?" I whispered and he stopped typing and paused.

"Why don't you tell him what's hurting you Kaoru." He finally said and I shook my head. "It is him that's causing you pain, isn't it?" He concluded and I stared at him awe-struck. Kyoya really does know just about everything.


	3. Chapter 3

Oh my good golly gosh i'm bored. Thanks to all who've reviewed and such. Your wonderful.

I dedicate this chapter to TheInfamousCaichie because likie all of us pervs she enjoys Kaoru and Hikaru 3 Even though this has little to none HikaKao love at all D: Awww I promise it'll get better!! (Maybe)

I don't own Ouran High School Host Club (if you didn't know)

I don't remember but I think this is the chapter with Kyoya. So if you don't like Kaoru being paired with everyone in the host club why are you still reading this? All he wants is loveeeee!! Lol, well no he's only paired with Kyoya and Tamaki... awww I gave away a plot twist D:

* * *

I was actually sitting in the library with Kyoya. We... Well he was doing research on what our newest cosplay should be. I sat there doing nothing. I just liked having someone with me.

Today we had a club meeting but me and Kyoya didn't go. Hence why we were in the library. I honestly didn't know why we were IN the library because he got internet in the club so why were we here?

"So what do you plan on doing with Hikaru?" Kyoya asked and I looked up at him. He wasn't paying any attention with eye contact but I knew he was really listening.

"I have no idea." I said softly. "I want him to know that we--" I stopped immediately. My face turned red and I sighed and looked down.

"Had your first time together?" Kyoya raised his eyebrow in a 'I knew all along' type face.

I was confused. How'd he know?

"....How did you--"

"--Please, don't try to underestimate my knowledge. Your attempts would be pathetic." He said sternly then turned to me smirking.

I sort of smiled back.

* * *

Tonight was different. I slept alone. When Hikaru walked into the room and laid on the bed, I made some excuse and left. I walked into the bathroom and grabbed a towel and used it as a pillow and laid on the bathroom floor and closed my eyes. The only thing I saw was the nightlight. It was about 10 at night and I missed Hikaru so much it hurt. I closed my eyes tightly so I wouldn't cry. It's his fault not mine... Or maybe it is. Maybe I shouldn't have fell in love with my own brother. Maybe then it wouldn't hurt right now.

"I love you Hikaru." I whispered and closed my eyes tighter and tried to go to sleep.

* * *

I woke up god knows when. It was a Saturday.

My cell phone went off. I looked down and it was a picture of Kyoya. I raised my eyebrow but opened it and pressed it to my ear.

"Hello?" I answered unsurely.

"Oh good so your up." He said and I pulled the phone away to discover he called me at 8 in the morning. My eyebrow twitched.

"Yes. Thanks to you." I grumbled.

"Well, I'm bored today. Would you like hang out?" He asked and I blinked. Why was he... Being... _nice_?

"Um.. Is anyone else--"

"Just me and you Kaoru." He answered my question without me asking it. I closed my eyes and nodded.

"Alright. I'll be over in a bit." I said finally and walked out of the bathroom and bumped into Dani.

"Master Kaoru, so you were in the bathroom." She said softly and I nodded.

"Yeah, things aren't going to well with me and Hikaru." I mumbled and she smiled.

"You need to talk to him about it." She said and I gave her a hopeful smile.

"Do you think you could do it for me?" I asked and she shook her head.

"Sorry Master Kaoru but Master Hikaru wouldn't openly talk to me about that stuff. Maybe you could get one of your other friends to do so." She said and slowly a smile formed. Kyoya!

"Thanks Dani! You gave me such a great idea!" I hugged her out of her surprise and dashed off.

I quickly got changed into casual attire and gave one last look at the sleeping Hikaru. I walked over and kissed his forehead.

"Hikaru... Even if you use me for your selfish reasons and even though you love Haruhi more than you do me... I'll always love you unconditionally. I love you Hikaru." I whispered and walked out of the room with a sigh. Good, now if I could only do that while he's up.

I walked out of the room and out of the house. I got into one of the limos and sighed.

"Take me to Kyoya's please." I said softly and he nodded and the car started moving.

* * *

When I got there to my surprise Kyoya was sitting on the steps waiting. He didn't even have his laptop.

I got out of my limo and walked over to him.

"You wanted to hang out Kyoya?" I asked and he glanced up at me and nodded.

"Let's go." He said and we walked to wherever he led us to.

We were in his room and it was pretty big. For some reason it made me miss Hikaru. I don't know why.

"So what are we going to do?" I asked and Kyoya started chuckling and turned to me.

"Have you ever wondered about me Kaoru?" He asked silkily. I tilted my head to the side.

"Kyoya, your not making sense." I was DEEPLY lost.

"Kaoru, you don't wonder how I'm always surrounded by beautiful women and don't consider one of them ever?" He continued and I slowly nodded.

"Kind of." I scratched my cheek. Was he actually going to let me in on a secret?

"Well that sucks for you, lets go get some breakfast." He said and my expression dropped and my eyebrow twitched.

_Guess not._

* * *

I spent the whole day with Kyoya. We really didn't to much but it was enough to keep me from being bored. He was actually a pretty alright person to hang out with.

"Well, let's get you home shall we?" Kyoya suggested and we got into his limo. "To the Hitachiin residence."

"Thanks Kyoya. For hanging out with me today." I said and smiled and casually turned to my window.

"Kaoru!" Kyoya yelled, trying to get my attention but it was to late.

"H-Hikaru?" He was walking with Haruhi. I quickly turned away and Kyoya looked at me with a blank stare.

"I'm sorry." I said kind of like a robot.

"...It's fine.." I pulled my legs to my chest and buried my face into my knees.

Then THE weirdest thing happened. Kyoya scooted closer to me and put his arm on my shoulder. It wasn't much but I leaned into him. Just to rest my head on his shoulder. But I was consoled. At least I had someone there for me. Even if it wasn't the love of my life.

* * *

The second I got home I said goodbye to Kyoya and went on a hunt for Dani. I needed to talk to her.

"Hey." I called out to the main maid of the house. "Where's Dani?" I asked and she shrugged.

"She should be somewhere Master Hikaru." I closed my eyes and turned my head.

"I'm Kaoru." I said softly and she looked slightly shocked.

"...I apologize Master Kaoru. You two just--"

"Look so much alike. I've heard it all before." With that I stormed off.

_I'M NOT HIKARU DAMNIT! I'M KAORU!!!_

I stormed upstairs and saw Dani. I was slightly relieved.

"Dani." I called and she turned to me. I almost started to cry. I wanted Hikaru!

"Oh Master Kaoru, do you need to talk to someone?" She asked and scurried over.

"I'm tired of being strong. I can't do it." I collapsed onto the floor and she caught me.

"Come on hun, let's go talk." She said softly and helped me to my feet and we walked to my room.

We sat on the bed as I tried to let out some things but then it got a bit more personal.

"...Well... Do you promise not to say anything no matter how bad it is?" I asked quietly and she nodded and held out her pinky with a smile.

"I pinky promise Master Kaoru." She said and I sighed and looked down blushing.

"Well... The other day he got really drunk, I was only slightly buzzed... But... We... We had sex." I started to slightly cry. "And then in the morning he didn't remember anything and he said obviously it wasn't important if he didn't remember! And then the OTHER day we had sex when he was drunk and I was completely sober. And he moaned fucking Haruhi's name!" I jumped up and threw something on the floor the first thing I could find. I started throwing a temper tantrum and I couldn't stop kicking, screaming and crying until Dani grabbed me roughly and pulled me in for a hug.

"I know your upset Kaoru. For now just let it out. I'll be here for you." She whispered and held me.

* * *

~~~Hikaru's POV~~~

"Well, later Haruhi!" I laughed and got a ride back to the house. Today was fun, I should hang out with her more often at those commoner's places.

I got inside and jogged up the stairs. I went to open my bedroom door but... It was locked?

"And the OTHER day we had sex when he was drunk and I was completely sober. And he moaned fucking Haruhi's name!" I stumbled backwards when I heard his cries and someone else was in the room.

"I know your upset Kaoru. For now just let it out. I'll be here for you."

I fell backwards completely. Against the opposite wall. My eyes were wide and they started watering. What kind of brother was I!?!?

I turned down the hallway and dashed off.

I'm the reason he was sad. The whole time it was me.

* * *

~~~Kaoru's POV~~~

I forgot how long I stayed in her arms crying for. My heart just ached and I wanted to be loved by somebody right now.

She made me lay down on the bed and she sat next to me and ran her fingers through my hair subconsciously as she hummed a sweet tune. Slowly my eyelids got more and more heavy. Until I finally fell asleep.

* * *

I don't remember when but sometime in the night Hikaru crawled into bed. My heart ached thinking about it.

He wrapped his arms around me and pulled me close to him. My eyes opened quickly and I turned to him. He had the most emotionless face I'd ever seen.

"Hika--" He cut me off with a kiss. He pulled back and glared.

"Why did you lie to me?" He snapped and my features softened.

"What?" I asked slowly and he pulled away from me.

"Why did you lie to me Kaoru!?" He asked again and I blinked.

"About what, Hikaru?" I asked even though I knew damn well what he was referring to.

"About what happened when I was drunk." He said flat out.

"...Well...... Honestly Hikaru...... I...."

_I can't tell him I love him. I've got to lie, again._

"I... I didn't want you to be embarrassed so I figured if you didn't find out then you wouldn't have having sex with your twin brother while intoxicated was on your conscience." _Liar._ Bloody _Liar._

"Oh... I'm sorry for doing such an awful thing. I promise not to ever do it again Kaoru. Please forgive me." Hikaru begged and my throat felt dry.

_But I want to do it again Hikaru. I just want you to know it's with me and I want you to be sober._

"I forgive you Hikaru." I whispered and turned my body to him to look at him smile. I hugged him and we cuddled closely. I missed holding him. It felt really nice. "I missed you."

"I missed you too Kaoru." He whispered gingerly in my ear. If only he knew HOW much I missed him.

If only he knew HOW much I love him.

If only he knew HOW much I want him with me.

If only he knew...

If only he knew...

That I'm in love with him.

If only...

But he doesn't and never will so, get over it Kaoru Hitachiin.

So I'll wait.

* * *

Nuuu, that wasn't the chapter with Kyoya. Next chapter I promise! ~_^

Review please :D (I like hearing from you guys :3)


	4. Chapter 4

*pretends to be Tamaki* (Dramatic wise) OH GOSH I'M SO SORRY!! THIS CHAPTER IS EXTREMELY SHORT! I DON'T DESERVE TO BE YOUR WRITER!! *sob* Or I could just upload a second one o.0 idk

This one is SORT of cute. ^^

But don't worry I ruin it in a different chapter 3

Oh, i'm changing the rules a bit. Since I like reviews (And i'm lonley at 3 in the morning) Whenever I get a review I'll put up another chapter :D

So I guess this means that this one is dedicated to... -!!! Come on guys, round of applause. If it weren't for her you'd have to wait to get another chapter xD

I down own Ouran.

* * *

Waking up in the morning cuddling with him was the best feeling in the world. I loved him.

It's Sunday and we woke up to Tamaki calling us. Great.

"What do you want Tamaki?" He groaned.

"I just wanted to know if you two finally made up!" He said dramatically and Hikaru glared at the phone.

"Yes. Go away." With that he hung up and I snuggled closer to him.

"Why must he bother us so early in the morning?" I grumbled and Hikaru sighed.

"I kn-- OH MY GOD!" He flew out of bed and quickly got changed into his casual clothes.

"What's going on Hikaru?" I asked curiously and stood up.

"I promised to meet Haruhi in an hour." Hikaru said and smiled. My heart shattered to pieces.

_Of coarse._

At that moment my phone rang. It was a picture of Kyoya.

"Who is it?" Hikaru asked and I ignored him and answered the phone.

"Hello?" I called into it and heard Kyoya on the other end.

"Oh good, your up." Like I haven't heard THAT one before... "Well, strangely enough I'm bored out of my mind. Would you like to hang out again today?" Kyoya asked and I couldn't help the grin creep up on my lips.

"No, no not at all! I'll come over in a half an hour!" I said happily.

"Alright, I'll be waiting." He said and we hung up and I dashed to the closet and go dressed with Hikaru staring at me hardcore.

"What?" I asked stopping in mid motion.

"Who are you hanging out with?" Hikaru asked and I smiled happily.

"Kyoya wants to hang out with me again. We hung out yesterday too." I laughed whole-heartedly. I didn't know why I was so excited to hang out with _Kyoya_ but I was.

"Oh oops! Forgot to shower!" I said and dashed into the bathroom. I wanted to smell nice of coarse!

* * *

~~~Hikaru's POV~~~

I watched as my younger twin brother ran into the bathroom and couldn't help but feel.... Alone.

"Kaoru..." I whispered and looked at the floor. He looked so happy. I've... I've never seen him look that way before.

Is this... Jealousy? Am I resenting Kyoya for taking away my brother?... But of coarse... I'm blind.

"Kaoru feels the same with Haruhi." I whispered and pursed my lips. I walked to the bathroom but paused.

No. I'll let him be happy.

So I left.

* * *

~~~Kaoru's POV~~~

I pulled up to Kyoya's house and again he was waiting outside, like he always was.

"Hey Kyoya-senpai." I said happily and he did a curt nod. "What are we doing?"

"Do you mind helping me out with a hypothesis Kaoru?" He asked me while rubbing his imaginary beard.

" Uh, I don't mind. What is it?" I asked with a smile and he turned.

"Follow me."

And so I did.

We walked into his room (which was still big and oddly white) and we sat on the couch and he pulled up his laptop and typed something for a moment. All I saw was it was labeled 'EXPERIMENT' so I guess we're going to talk about that.

"What's the Independent and Dependent variables?" I asked and he raised his eyebrow.

"You still remember those terms?" He asked then slightly smirked and I nodded.

"Yeah of coarse I do. I'm bad at Math, not Science." I said and flashed a smile.

"You'll find out momentarily." He started typing again and I sighed. Couldn't he just do the experiment already?

* * *

~~~About a half an hour later~~~

I honestly don't remember what we said 20 minutes ago but this is one of the most interesting experiments I've ever been a part of.

Me and Kyoya were making out on his couch, he was shirtless and my shirt was slowly being removed. Honestly, I was getting a hard-on. I wouldn't admit that out loud though. But I'm sure he could tell.

The experiment was he was trying to see if he found guys attractive. I already knew I did so I didn't care. I was used before so it didn't matter did it? And plus, for an ice prince this guy could make you feel amazing.

He was kissing down my neck and finally he pulled off my shirt and eyed my chest. His hands ran down my bare skin and he looked at me in the eyes.

"Hikaru?" He asked and just now did I remember all of the hickeys all over my body. I blushed and he just chuckled and pushed himself off of me.

"Is that it?" I asked and he turned to me with a curt nod.

"Yes." He said shortly and I looked away from him. I wanted more.

"Oh." I said and slowly pulled on my shirt.

Did I like Kyoya? I don't know... I honestly don't know what's up with people nowadays.

* * *

After a very awkward half hour of complete silence other than Kyoya's fingers across the keyboard of his laptop, I finally decided that I was no more use for him so got up and put on my shoes.

"Leaving so soon?" He asked not even looking at me.

"You care why?" I asked solemnly. He said nothing and I walked out of the door and got a ride back to my house.

My head was resting on the window and I looked out the window and watched things go by.

"Why doesn't anyone love me?" I whispered softly. "Not Hikaru, not Kyoya."

I walked to my room and saw that Hikaru wasn't there. Most likely he was still out with Haruhi. I haven't been gone very long.

I laid on the bed, not even taking off my shoes or anything. I just went to sleep.

* * *

I heard someone knock lightly but I was much to lazy and tired to say anything. The door was opened slowly and I opened my eye the slightest to try to see who was coming in and saw Dani.

She walked over and knelt by my side and pulled off my shoes and tossed them to the floor. She helped me out of my jacket and for those few moments I was laying limp.

She tugged my socks off and threw them in the dirty hamper and hung up my coat and placed my shoes neatly in the shoe rack.

She walked over back to my side and I heard her giggle softly.

"Master Kaoru, you'll get a break sometime. I promise." She whispered softly and ran her fingertips through my hair then got up and left the room.

My eyes opened completely and I smiled.

Hikaru may not love me. Kyoya may not love me. But Dani did. Even if it wasn't in the way I wanted to be loved, I knew she was there for me.

* * *

I woke up with _no one_ in the bed with me. I looked at the clock and it read 5:23am.

I could've cried. I didn't know where Hikaru was. I sat up on my bed and looked around.

He spend the night with her...

I laid back down and sighed.

The door opened about 20 minutes later. It was Hikaru in a towel. I couldn't help but smile.

"Hikaru where were you?" I asked and he looked at me before pulling out his clothes.

"Taking a shower. I smelt like commoners." He said rather obnoxiously and I grinned. Hikaru.

He got changed and climbed into bed next to me. I cuddled up to his chest and he wrapped his arms around me. I was SO tired. I looked at him and yawned.

"You know Hikaru." I started and slowly started to dose off.

"What Kaoru?" Hikaru said softly.

"The people said Disney World was the happiest place on earth." I stated and I was coming closer to my unconscious state.

"Yeah." He was slowly fading away.

"They've obviously never been in your arms then..." With that I fell asleep.

* * *

~~~Hikaru's POV~~~

"They've obviously never been in your arms then..." I could say it plainly. I didn't expect him to say that. In fact, it kind of hurt me when he said that.

You might think why, it seems that Kaoru is happiest with me.. And recently I've been avoiding him.. I looked down with a frown. I've been a horrible brother, haven't I?

* * *

Remember my ducklings, Review=new chapter!! :D


	5. Chapter 5

Holy ritz crackers. I got so many reviews at once I felt like I was going to drown in them lmao xD

But I know you people read this for Kaoru and Hikaru but this shows that Kaoru is really fragile and all he wants is someone to love him.

Hence the smut with Tamaki :)

If you don't like those scenes then like in my other stories: You shouldn't be reading my stories xD

This chapter is dedicated to: SuikaChan555 for her constant reviews (I love you :D) and Blaze Moonlight

Thank you guys and everyone should thank you for getting this chapter put up!! :)

* * *

I looked at Kaoru. He was still sleeping. It's about 5 minutes passed when we usually wake up for school but I just wanted to hold him right now. He was smiling which was good. I wonder what he was dreaming about.

"Kaoru, I promise that I won't hurt you anymore." I kissed his forehead and the maid he always talks to walked in softly.

"Masters, it's time to get up." She said calmly and I glared over at her. I knew it was time to get up. She didn't have to be so intrusive!

Kaoru slowly started to stir and he pushed away from me to stretch out like he did every morning when he woke up.

"Thank you Dani." He said tiredly and rubbed his eye.

* * *

~~~Kaoru's POV~~~

I was sitting on the sofa at the host club. It seemed that Hikaru abandoned me for Haruhi. I sighed and looked down.

Jeezus. Why couldn't I tell him how I felt about him? I didn't care if it was wrong!

Then I had Kyoya sitting on the other end of the couch typing contently. I looked down. Why didn't anyone pay attention to me?

I pursed my lips.

_I, Kaoru Hitachiin wish that Haruhi Fujioka never passed her entrance exam!_

She stole my big brother away from me! The bitch! I hate her! I hate her!!

I stood up from the couch with my hair covering my eyes and simply walked out.

Nobody noticed.

Nobody cared.

"I truly am all alone." I whispered and a tear rolled down my cheek. "I wish that it was just us two again. I wish that he didn't pay attention to anybody but me. Why does it have to be so hard!?"

I heard footsteps walking towards me and my eyes widened but since I was looking downwards with my hair covering my eyes I didn't know who was coming.

I felt a hand on my shoulder and then I felt an embrace.

Tono-senpai?

"Tamaki?" I whispered slightly surprised.

"You seemed very alone Kaoru-kun." He whispered softly in my ear. He pulled away and I saw he looked kind of sad. "If you want I'll be here for you."

"...Tono-senpai... What about Haruhi?" I asked lightly and he smiled sadly.

"What about her? All she does is hang around Hika-kun. I've noticed it's got you down. It kinda has me upset too. What do you say we hang out today? Let's take the rest of the club off. After all, all we're doing is discussing our next cosplay but that's just fine. I've already decided." Tamaki held my hand and smiled at me. "Let's go shall we?"

"..Tono-senpai." I whispered and then smiled up at him. "Hai. Let's go."

* * *

I could EASILY say I was surprised with this outcome.

Me and Tono-senpai were laying sprawled over his king sized bed, piss drunk.

I never though the king would get drunk. Especially with his ignorant innocents.

I don't really remember how it happened but we were talking about this book that both of us were told to read. We went to the commoner's book store to buy it and we were reading it together.

It was a book by the name of Crank. It described alcohol so greatly, the extreme numbness you get from drinking it. We just had to drink until we couldn't feel the pain.

Of coarse nothing perverted happened, after all, it IS Tamaki but I knew Tamaki was gorgeous but somehow the alcohol made him look _ravishing._

"Y-you kn...know *hic* w-we could do SO mu-uch better 'lone than wiff them." Tamaki said and grinned widely as he traced the whiskey bottle with his fingers.

That stuff definitely burned your throat but it did the job. We were drunk as could be.

"Pftchah." I agreed even though I had NO idea what the noise I just made was.

"C-c-commoners have such I-interesting *hic* books." Tamaki said and pointed to the cover of the book we were reading and I nodded.

I sat up, the room started spinning but I crawled over to the side where Tamaki was.

_I just want to be __loved_.

I gave him a very uncoordinated sloppy amateur kiss. It didn't matter though because he returned it.

I never thought I'd see either parts of Tamaki that I saw today in a lifetime.

"Your looking... _gorgeous_ mon ami." Tamaki gave me a drunken grin and I purred slightly.

"You too." I agreed and kissed him again.

The make out session was as innocent as you could possibly be with drunken make out sessions. We stayed strictly on each other's face, meaning sometimes we missed when we went to kiss each other, but for the most part, _pretty innocent_.

But then, we remembered that _one_ chapter.

Tamaki's hands roamed down to my shoulders which is where he pulled off my tie and my jacket. I helped rid him of those oh so heavy clothes and left him shirtless.

Sure Kyoya was pretty hot but Tamaki was _fucking gorgeous_.

Tamaki unbuttoned my shirt and I helped him pull it off.

Now here came the tricky question in my mind.

_If we're going to actually go as far as have sex, who's going to be the pitcher?_

But I shoved that to the back of my mind and continued playing with Tamaki. First it was pretty mild, just playing with his nipples and sucking on his neck, which he thoroughly enjoyed, but he got hard--_fast_.

I should just add this to my list of firsts.

I kissed down his chest until I got to where his pants begun. He had a pleading look on and that's ALL I needed to see from him. I quickly yanked off his belt and pants and left Tamaki in his underwear. I could see the bulge, which didn't help mine much and I pulled down his underwear to reveal _all_ of Tamaki.

I've never been so turned on before.

Sure, sure, Tamaki was a very gorgeous man in his face, and his words were like sweet velvet, but if you saw him completely naked, you'd have trouble not by having an orgasm right then and there.

I decided to keep him waiting, just to see how much he wanted it. I went back to his face and kissed down his neck and sucked on his collar bone and heard him whine.

"Your not kidd..ing right?" I could tell he was slowly coming out of his drunken slurs. Me too. He was getting better at talking. I smirked and slid down his chest and down to his _extremely_ large, hard, thick penis.

His knees were bent and his legs were only slightly pulled apart but I spread his legs more for easier access and stuck out my tongue and lightly licked the tip which caused him to shiver. I smirked. I AM a devilish twin.

"Stop toying wiff me." He demanded and I couldn't help but think he was cute when he said wiff instead of with.

I wrapped my hand around his member and rubbed up and down. Then I took my hand off after a few seconds of thinking. I took my thumb and pressed it to the vein and then with all of my other fingertips and pressed them on the opposite side and then stroked him. He let out a shaky moan and I put just the head in my mouth and lightly let my teeth stroke it.

With my other hand I cupped his balls and slightly played with them. He started squirming. I knew he was enjoying this.

So was I. My pants felt tight, really, really tight.

I sucked harder and then nipped at the tip and licked any cum that dared come out.

Tamaki was letting out sweet moans that made me want him more and more with each passing minute. Moans even escaped my own mouth which made Tamaki's back arch. Oh right, vibrations.

Finally though, I felt a lot of salty liquid in my mouth and quickly swallowed as if I was taking bad medicine.

Tamaki was panting and he grabbed me by my shoulders and pulled me into a kiss which I gladly returned.

I felt his hand slowly make it down to my pants and I smirked and hell, threw my pants off for him. It was very uncomfortable in there anyway.

Tamaki threw me to the bed and kissed me everywhere. No where was left untouched by his sweet lips. He kissed down my jaw line and I got goose bumps. I let out a content sigh. I paid no attention to the fact that my boxers were still on. I just loved the attention I was getting from Tamaki. He leaned into my ear, I could tell he was lust driven.

"I want you.. _so_ bad." He whispered breathlessly and I looked at him and kissed him.

"Then take me." I said softly and he tilted his head slightly.

"Y...You sure?" I nodded and he pulled off my underwear and I saw him eye me. Of coarse I was a decent size, I don't know which of us is bigger, Tamaki or me. But size didn't matter, how you used it did.

He greedily consumed every inch of my naked body. I could say I did the same with his.

Since he was just in my mouth there was a pretty decent amount of lubricant already on his penis but he got off the bed and stumbled over to his dresser and pulled out lotion. I smirked. Even drunk he's pretty clever.

He got back onto the bed and spread my legs apart.

Yeah, always the catcher.

He slowly pushed himself inside of me and paused when he saw my face. Yeah it was painful but soon it wouldn't be.

He winced slightly.

"Kaoru... Y-you think you co-could relax?" He slurred and I blushed and nodded and he pushed himself in deeper. Slowly he pulled back, then pushed back in. It was at a pretty steady constant pace until we were content and wanted to go faster.

He leaned in and wrapped his arms around me and kissed me as he stopped thrusting. I kissed back and when we stopped kissing he sucked on my neck and went at a faster pace.

He got faster.

He got harder.

He got deeper.

He hit a certain spot that nearly blurred my vision it felt so fantastic. I moaned a long shaky moan.

"Tamaki." I moaned but what he did next kind of surprised me.

He closed his eyes and pushed inside of me again.

"Kaoru." He moaned and I smiled softly.

Even with his eyes closed he's thinking of me.

"G-go faster." I said and he kissed my collarbone.

"As you wish." He whispered and I felt him speed up significantly. He slammed into that one spot and I gasped.

"T-Tamaki." I shivered and he drove himself harder.

"K-Kaoru." Why did that always make me happy?

One of Tamaki's hands moved down to my erect penis and he started rubbing me. Which had its own charm.

"T-Tamaki!" I came all over my chest. He was still thrusting with shorter choppier breaths.

"K-Kaoru." He still wasn't done. His hand continued to pleasure me as he pleasured himself with thrusting inside of me. "I-I want you to cum twice for me Kaoru." He whispered in my ear and I turned red but nodded. "Good boy."

I REALLY never saw this side of Tamaki.

And why couldn't someone introduce us sooner?

He kept hitting that spot that made me moan. I guess that's why he hit it huh?

"Oh god Tamaki.." I gasped and I saw him bite his lip. I knew he didn't want to let go before I did so I tried to hurry up even though I was savoring the pleasure.

"Cum for me." He whispered again and every time I heard it I felt closer. "Moan."

"T-Tamaki." He kissed my chest.

"Louder."

"Tamaki!" And yet again, I released all over my stomach. He gave it a few more thrusts and looked a lot more relieved.

He pulled himself out of me which made me give a slight whimpering noise and his tongue went up and down my torso. He licked up all of the cum and licked the tip of my penis. I gasped and he crawled up to me and kissed me.

"...D-do you w.. want me to go?" I asked and he shook his head and sat up and got the blankets from underneath us and pulled them over us.

"Sleep with me." He said softly and wrapped his arms around me and I smiled and nuzzled against Tono-senpai and fell asleep.

* * *

I fucking LOVE this chapter. I don't know why but I do. Awwwwz I love Tono :D 3 isn't he sweet.

Keep sending reviews my lovlies! 3 ^^ They make me happy. They make me put up a chapter yay. :3


	6. Chapter 6

I'd say this is the most dramatic chapter but I'd be lying.

Well.... This is the most dramatic chapter so far. Next chapter will beat this one down with a stick :)

And a bit more Tamaki smut at the beginning because lets face it... Tamaki is sexy. And Tamaki with Kaoru is just UGH orgasmic ;D

ok, dedication time. This chapter is dedicated to, Dianqa2 and her alone because she's just so sweet! *hugs* I hope you like it!

Well... I hope everyone likes it! :D Enjoy the dramaticness... and naked Tamaki with naked Kaoru. ^^

* * *

I woke up to Tamaki's alarm clock. We both opened our eyes and looked at each other. My heart dropped. For a second I didn't remember why I was there but then somehow the memories flooded back. My face went pale.

"What happened?" Tamaki groaned. "My head hurts." He whined and sat up and paused and looked down and saw that he was completely naked. His cheeks turned rosy and he turned his head away from me.

My expression softened.

"If I remember correctly..." He started and turned to me and made me sit up, then moved the blankets from my lap and blushed when he discovered I was INDEED naked under them. "We drank... And..." He blushed bright red.

"Had sex..." I mumbled and Tamaki put his finger on his chin in thought.

_Now Tamaki is going to hate me forever... This is just fucking fantast--_

My thoughts were cut off with a light kiss from Tamaki.

"And if I do remember correctly, you were wonderful." Those words could've made me cry.

Tamaki was the only one to not push me away. For that, I'm thankful.

"Well come on, we should probably shower." Tamaki giggled innocently and got off the bed. I raised an eyebrow.

"Together?" I asked and he turned to me with a confused expression.

"Well since we did what we did there's really no hiding anything. We've seen each other naked already." He smiled cutely and I couldn't help but return it. "If you don't want to there's another bathroom down the hall."

"It's ok, I'll shower with you." I said and hopped off of the bed and followed him into his own personal bathroom.

He turned on the shower and then as he waited for it to heat up he turned to me.

"So... What do you remember from last night?" He asked blushing and I thought for a second.

"The one line I remember you saying the most... 'cum for me'." He blushed and turned away.

"Oh... Right." He said bashfully and I was done being shy.

"It was kind of sexy actually." I chimed in and Tamaki turned to me with his red face.

"Really?" He asked and I nodded.

"You look so cute when you blush Tono-senpai." I said and kissed him lightly and he smiled.

"You look really cute in the morning." Tamaki said and pulled the shower door back, the tub was huge. He pulled me in with him, both of us chuckling. When the water hit his hair I was mesmerized. He dazzled me. The water dripped down his body and I couldn't believe that he could look even better.

* * *

Five minutes later I was against the wall with Tamaki slamming himself inside of me. Oh my god I couldn't believe how much I wanted him. My chest hit the wall somewhat with every thrust. His hands were on my hips but as he pulled me closer his hands went down and rubbed my penis.

I honestly couldn't believe I was having sober sex with Tamaki. It just seemed completely OOC of him.

But I didn't care. It felt SO good.

Maybe I should sleep over Tamaki's house more often.

* * *

Somehow our uniforms miraculously got cleaned and we were dressed and ready to go. I looked over at Tamaki who was looking at me emotionlessly.

"What is it Tamaki?" I asked and walked over to him.

"I was just thinking..." He said lightly. "What does that make us?"

"....What do you want it to make us?" I asked and he shrugged.

"I don't know. We were pretty stupid right there." He said and that took a hammer to my heart.

"Yeah..." Tamaki walked over and hugged me.

"I wouldn't regret it though." He said and I smiled and hugged back.

"Me neither." I smiled and he gave me a cute grin.

"Are we... Friends? Lovers? Secret lovers?" Tamaki asked and I smiled.

"Well, I'm guessing friends is we forget about the whole thing, lovers is we date and people know and secret lovers is basically fuck buddies." I laughed and Tamaki slowly nodded.

"Your right..." He said finally then blushed. "Wanna go out?" He asked quickly and I crossed my arms with my eyebrow raised.

"Your Tamaki, the king of the host club and you can't even properly ask me out?" I teased and he thought for a second and laughed.

"Of coarse! Sorry. So silly of me. Kaoru Hitachiin, you make me happy when I'm near you, and you're the only one who knows the re--"

"Yes." I completely cut him off with the most blunt, unromantic answer ever. He turned white and went to the corner.

"I didn't even get to finish my speech." He whimpered.

"Sorry boss." I laughed.

* * *

I don't know what it was. I was sitting in my class, sitting next to Haruhi who sat next to Hikaru. I felt a wave of importance. I was dating Tamaki.

I couldn't help but smile and blush. We really didn't say anything to anyone yet.

"Hey Kaoru. Why weren't you home yesterday?" Hikaru asked and that earned Haruhi's attention.

"Oh, so you noticed?" I asked a bit rudely. "I slept over Tono-senpai's house."

"Why didn't you tell me?" Hikaru asked and I looked over at him and shrugged.

"Kind of a last minute thing. I didn't expect to go to his house. He said "Let's hang out" and I said "ok" so we went to his house and fell asleep."

_Technically I'm not lying. I just didn't tell him what happened in-between._

"Oh.. Well, if you go again could you tell me, I was kind of worried." My heart sped up and I had butterflies in my stomach. I slightly blushed but it was nothing noticeable.

"Yeah... Sorry Hika-kun." I said softly and he simply smiled at me.

"It's ok." He turned his attention to the teacher... Well not for long anyway. He was sleeping within minutes.

_...He was worried... Well, of coarse he was worried!! I didn't come home last night! It's nothing to spas over! Even though I do wish he loved me like I loved him... No, no thinking like that. I'm with Tamaki._

I let a smile crawl on my lips.

* * *

"Everyone!" Tamaki yelled and everyone turned to him. It was just before the Host Club was opened so it was only us there. Me, Tamaki, Honey, Mori, Kyoya, Hikaru and Haruhi. "I wanna say something." He blushed cutely. It made me smiled just looking at his adorable face.

"What is it Tono-kun?" Honey asked with a big grin as he bit some of his cake.

"I am in a relationship." Tamaki blushed pink and everyone paused and turned to him.

"With who?" Haruhi asked with her eyebrow raised.

"Someone you know." Tamaki said grinning.

"Who Tono-kun!?" Honey asked excitedly and Tamaki smirked.

"Please rise mon amour." He said and I couldn't help but giggle when I stood up and walked over to him.

"KAORU!?!!!?!" They yelled surprised. Even Kyoya was slightly taken back.

"Surprised much?" I joked and Tamaki hugged me and I hugged him back.

* * *

Tonight I was at my own house however. I didn't want Hikaru to think I forgot about him or anything. Even though he forgot about me.

I was laying there reading a book when I heard someone walk down the hallway very... Klutz like. The door was opened and I paid no mind to it. It was Hikaru, I knew that much.

The door closed and he walked over to the bed and sat on the edge, the opposite side I was at and started to pull off his shoes and jacket. I didn't say anything. I had NOTHING to say. So I just read my book.

He climbed onto the bed and grabbed the book from my hands and threw it. I slowly turned to him, slightly afraid and I saw it in his face.

"...Hikaru your drunk." I said softly and he grabbed my shoulders and slammed me to the bed and kissed me.

I couldn't help but like it. I've concluded that no matter how hard I try I just can't stop loving him.

But I was slightly angry. I shoved him off.

"You said you wouldn't do this." I said and he glared at me.

"Kaoru, I need this." He whispered huskily and started stripping me of my clothes.

"I'm with Tamaki." I said defensively and I was finally completely undressed. He just pulled off his pants and continued to ignore me. "No, I can't do this Hikaru!" I yelled and he grabbed me roughly and slammed me to the bed.

"Pretend its with Tamaki. After all, I'm not going to be thinking of you at all." He said and my eyes widened and my heart broke. I went to push myself up but felt him slam himself inside of me. Tears rolled down my cheek.

"Hika--" He pushed my head back into the pillows. His eyes were closed and he was concentrated.

I knew it wasn't me who he wanted.

It was Haruhi.

I started whimpering. Then crying. But by the time I almost got to sobbing he was done with me. He said his share of moaning Haruhi's name while he drove himself inside of his younger brother.

He went to sleep instantly after pulling out of me.

I started shaking and quickly pulled on my boxers and ran out of the room. Tears just blindly poured out of my eyes.

_WHY CAN'T I EVER STOP BEING HURT!?_

I took a sharp turn at the staircase and tripped and fell down them. I slammed my head on the floor and the last thing I heard was Dani screaming.

* * *

I don't know when I woke up. Come to think of it I don't remember much at all.

I turned to see someone at my bedside. She had long brown hair, green eyes and a birthmark near the corner of her left eye.

"...Do I know you?" I asked and she pursed her lips sadly and walked to my side and held my hand. "Where am I?"

"Your in the hospital sweetie. You've been out for a while now." She informed me. "I'm Dani. Your maid."

"Um Dani they didn't have any iced.. Tea.." A blonde gaped at me. He was tall and pretty handsome, he had dark blue eyes that seemed to glow and he stared at me for quite some time.

He held back a smile then ran over and hugged me.

"Kao-kun!!! Your ok!!" He yelled happily.

"Kao-kun?" My head tilted to the side. "Who are you?"

"Tamaki, he has amnesia." Dani said softly and Tamaki looked down slightly upset.

"Oh... Well hi. Your Kaoru. I'm Tamaki." He said with a soft smile and I nodded slowly.

"I think he's in here." A male said and a group of people walked in.

"Who are they?" I attempted to whisper to Tamaki but it was no use, they heard me and stared at me like I was retarded.

"What do you MEAN who are we?" A red head with gold eyes asked with an angry face. "Please Kaoru, stop playing these stupid games!"

"...You look awfully familiar.." I whispered and his eyebrow twitched.

"That's your twin brother, Hikaru. The one with the glasses is Kyoya, then the tiny one is Honey, the tall quiet one is Mori and that one is Haruhi." Tamaki said and I smiled.

"Nice to meet you all." I said and laughed cutely.

"What the hell is he talking about Haruhi?" I heard Hikaru whisper. Suddenly I remembered.

Haruhi.. I remember _that_ voice saying _that_ name.

_Haruhi._

I heard Hikaru moan and my pupils dilated. Suddenly everything came back. All of the pain, all of the hurt, all of the memories I didn't want to keep.

So I screamed. I screamed at the top of my lungs.

* * *

Well the Tamaki scenes were kind of corny but cute. ^^ I like them. And this makes me want to kick Hikaru and Haruhi multiple times.

I honestly gave up on the manga when I found out Hikaru liked her. I was like "WHAT THE HELL!? WHY IS EVERYONE FALLING FOR THIS BITCH!?" I hate animes like that!!! It's kind of cute with Tamaki but EVERYONE is like "ohhhhh Haruhiiiiii love me tenderlyyyyy" and I'm like "GAH! WHY AM I STILL READING THIS PIECE OF SHIT!?" lmfao. Well thats my angry rant for now! lol

Review please! ^-^


	7. Chapter 7

Ok, well this chapter is just downright depressing as all fuck. But whatever. It's part of my plot. My EVIL plot *Marik laugh from Yugioh the abridged series*

Well this whole chapter is in the hospital.. I only remembered after I had most of the chapter in the hospital that they'd just have private doctors come to their house but whatever. It makes it more interesting.

I honestly don't like Haruhi to much but I made myself like her in this chapter and I'm kind of afraid how xD

most of you will be saying GO HARUHI!!! near the endish but not quite. :P

This chapter is dedicated to.... Ch3rryc0l4!!!

:D enjoy people!!

* * *

"AHHHHHH!!!! NO! NO! NO! NO!!!!!" I started thrashing and kicking and crying. I held my ears and tears flooded down my face.

"Kaoru!" Tamaki cried out surprised.

"Calm down!" Haruhi screamed and I completely paused everything and looked at her. My insides were on fire.

"YOU!!!" I hissed and lunged for her but Dani and Tamaki held me back. She flinched and Hikaru stood in front of her.

"WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU KAORU!?!" He yelled and I started sobbing.

"I HATE YOU HARUHI! I HATE YOU _MORE_ HIKARU!!!" I was throwing the worst temper tantrum of my life.

"What did I do?!" Haruhi asked surprised like she never knew somebody had the right to accuse her.

I turned to Dani, who I knew she knew absolutely everything. _Everything._ Uncensored. _She_ knew.

She looked at me softly and hugged me and I cried.

"Why does this always happen to me?" I sobbed out and she stroked my hair.

"It's ok." She cooed.

"Why does WHAT always happen to you?! Nothing seems to be going wrong besides the fact that you're a klutz and fell down the stairs!" Haruhi yelled and I stopped everything again.

"...So Hikaru..." I said dangerously low and turned to face his direction but looked downwards. "You don't remember what happened the night I fell?" I asked and Dani covered her mouth. She knew. She heard everything. She closed her eyes and tried not to cry as she saw me completely break down.

"...What happened?" Tamaki asked softly and I looked away and laid down.

"I'm awfully tired now. I'm gonna go to sleep. Night boss..." I whispered softly and closed my eyes with tears still coming out of them.

* * *

~~~No one's POV~~~

"Everyone leave him." Dani said and wiped under her eyes.

"What did you do?" Tamaki asked Hikaru with a glare.

"I don't know what your talking about." Hikaru said with a shrug and that obnoxious look of his and he walked out.

"But he does." Dani whispered mainly to herself but didn't expect everyone else to hear her.

"What did he do?" Haruhi asked and Dani shook her head and looked upwards. The type you do when you blink a million times to blink away your tears.

"Nothing." She whispered and continued stroking his hair.

"Please Dani." Tamaki pleaded and she shook her head.

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't put their dirty laundry out in the open." She said sternly.

"Can you at least tell us on a scale of 1-10, how bad it is?" Tamaki asked, hoping for a low number. Possibly 0?

"....11." Dani walked out of the room even though she wanted so badly to stay with Kaoru. He was he son as far as she knew. She loved the kid.

Kyoya pushed his glasses up and looked around the room. HE knew the secret. HE knew what Hikaru did. HE knew everything. But he didn't know it involved Haruhi that deeply.

"Maybe you guys should leave." Tamaki said and just noticed Honey was crying.

"What's wrong Honey?" He asked softly and Honey rubbed his eyes.

"Awww I knew something was wrong with him but he wouldn't tell me. I'm sad thinking about what Hika-kun did to Kao-kun!" Honey whimpered and Mori hugged him and they walked out of the room. Kyoya followed briskly.

That just left Haruhi and Tamaki.

"Do you think it's really that bad?" Haruhi finally asked and Tamaki looked at the floor.

"Obviously somehow it involves you. I don't know how, you barely talk to him but whatever you and Hikaru did REALLY hurt Kaoru." Tamaki concluded.

"I don't even know what I did..." Haruhi muttered angrily.

* * *

~~~ Kaoru's POV ~~~

"Your up." Tamaki cheered happily and I nodded slowly and yawned.

"Hi Tamaki." I grumbled and he kissed my cheek.

"Listen, darling. I need you to do me a favor." He said lightly and sat next to my bed.

"What Tamaki?" I asked and he ran his fingers through my hair.

"I know you probably don't want to tell me, but I need to try. Please don't throw another tantrum. Mon amour, tell me what happened with you and Hikaru." My heart stopped.

I'm not even kidding. I was hooked up to the machine and for a few seconds it was just a straight line.

"A-are you ok?" Tamaki asked and tears were in my eyes.

"No Tamaki. I'm not. Does it look like I am?" I asked angrily. I was heartbroken.

Tamaki hugged me tightly.

"It's ok. I'm here. Tell me when your ready." He cooed.

_...Senpai, I'll _never_ be ready to tell you that. I don't want you to worry, I don't want you to hate my brother. I don't want to ruin my life by telling everyone my personal business. _

* * *

I'm alone right now. I'm looking at the wall waiting for someone to come in and talk to me. When the hell am I getting out of here anyway?

I heard footsteps and I looked up and saw myself.

"Hikaru." My heart sped up. He knew it did. Stupid machine.

He turned around so he wasn't facing me and that broke my heart.

"What. Are you turning around so you could pretend your talking to Haruhi and not me?" I sneered and he let out a hiss.

"I'm facing this way so I don't have the urge to PUNCH YOU IN THE FACE!" He barked.

"Why what did I do?" I asked lowly and he turned to me with a bitter look.

"Because of you, HARUHI WONT TALK TO ME!!" He yelled and panted. Finally he got that off his chest.

I looked down and couldn't help the smirk that came to my lips.

_Perfect._

"Wipe that damn smirk off of your face Kaoru." He hissed and I looked at him.

"...Why don't you love me Hikaru?" I don't know why I said that. I guess the narcotics I'm on helped me sound like an asshole.

"...What?" Hikaru leaned in like he didn't believe what I said.

"..I said... Why don't you love me Hikaru?" My voice was cracking and he rolled his eyes.

"I can't deal with this right now.." He walked out of my room and I collapsed on my bed in sobs. Why couldn't he love me? Why couldn't he love me for me, and not for me pretending to be Haruhi. What's so special about her anyway?

"Kaoru..." Tamaki's soft voice said and he rushed over to me and sat next to me on the small bed and held me close.

Honestly I want to love Tamaki. He's sweet. He does things for me. But I can't no matter how hard I try. I love... I love Hikaru. Why do I love him? He's an asshole. He uses me.

Tamaki chuckled softly and I looked at his eyes. It was the same face he made when he was the lonely prince. Those sad eyes but he was smiling.

"It's kind of funny..." He started and pulled me closer. "How someone could break your heart... But you can't find it in any of the shards to let them go. In fact you love them more. You want them more. You love them with every shard."

I looked at him in awe. He knew.

"Tono--" He kissed me lightly.

"Listen Kaoru. We haven't been dating long but I really like you. So I'll be here for you the whole time even if you ache for Hikaru's love over mine. But that's ok. You may love Hikaru but.. Do you at least tolerate me?" He asked an my features softened.

"Tono-senpai... I _really _like you. A lot. You were there for me when nobody else was. Well.. Except for Dani but you were there with a different kind of love. A kind of love I ached for but never received. Thank you." I hugged him and he chuckled softly and stroked my hair.

"I'll be here for you through everything Kao-kun. If you need me I'm here. But that's what boyfriends do, right?" He had that adorable smile on and I grinned and hugged him.

"Yeah I guess so." Even though I wasn't in love with Tamaki, I loved him.

* * *

~~~Hikaru's POV~~~

"Hey Haruhi." I called and she didn't turn to me. She was sitting by herself in the waiting room reading a book. I felt my insides boil. "Haruhi!"

She glared at me.

"What the hell is that look for?" I asked rudely and she closed her eyes with an aggravated expression and closed the book and put it down in front of her and put her hands on her lap and took in a deep breath.

"I don't want to talk to you until I found out what you did that made Kaoru hate me so much!" She yelled and my heart dropped.

I want her to love me like I love her.

"Haruhi, I didn't do any--"

"That's bullshit." She said and brushed passed me and I shivered as I looked at her walk away.

"Playing hard to get I see." I smirked and she paused and turned around and walked over to me.

"With what you did to Kaoru, your _brother_ I wouldn't date you if my life OR your life depended on it Hikaru. Just look at that boy and you could SEE he's upset... You know I looked at him one day when you two were talking. It's like the second he saw you everything was fine. He was happy. But the second you left to talk to me.. He was sad again. I know he's jealous of me which I find ridiculous but he really loves you Hikaru and your just brushing him off, for a _girl_. A _girl_ that doesn't even like you like that. Just look at him. Watch his whole world brighten when you come in the room but the second you say something watch his heart break because your so insensitive. See how much you want to play with his emotions again." She left me stunned and she just stomped away.

I started to shake and tears streamed down my face.

_Haruhi will never date me... She's all that matters to me and she wont date me because of Kaoru..._

* * *

~~~Kaoru's POV~~~

I was being rocked by Tamaki. I really enjoyed when he was with me. I felt so complete. Then footsteps walked into my room. We both looked and my heart ached.

"Hello... Haruhi..." I said sadly. "I.... I'm sorry about earlier..."

"Don't worry about it. I just want to know why you don't like me very much." She said and I just heard Hikaru moan her name in MY ear. I started shaking and I closed my eyes and shook my head.

"Don't cry..." I whispered to myself and covered my eyes with my hands.

"I was kind of wondering that too." Tamaki whispered and held me closer.

"...S-she didn't do anything... It... It was Hikaru who made me resent her." I didn't want them to know why. Even if it ate me slowly I couldn't let them know.

"Why?" Haruhi asked and I turned away from both of them and curled up.

"I'm tired..." I whispered mainly to myself. I couldn't let them know about Hikaru and what he did... Maybe he deserved Haruhi's love.. Instead of mine...

_My name is Kaoru Hitachiin, the younger of twins. My older brother is Hikaru Hitachiin, he's my world. I would do anything for him no matter how stupid it was. All he needed to do was tell me. I love him more than I loved anyone else. Throughout our whole life he was the only one who was there for me. My opposite, my life. _

I was kicked out of my thoughts by the doctors rushing into the room and people screaming.

I couldn't breath. I was hyperventilating. And I couldn't breath... And I couldn't feel pain.. But I saw a light.

* * *

I honestly think this chapter is really short but its not. I don't know why I think that though o_O

Well this is the last chapter I'm due to put up because I ran out of reviews. haha (oh jesus I'm in over my head. This one will get like 12 reviews of people wanting to know what happens o.0 jesus....)

haha. well i'm off to watch NTAS 23 because it makes me happy. :D


	8. Chapter 8

D'awwww D: this chapter is under 2,000!! It's only 1,829 T^T i'm sorry.

There was actually a lot in this chapter I was holding back. I kind of wanted to draw it out so the story would be longer.

This chapter might regain Hikaru's fans :) And Dani strikes yet again! Awh I love her.

Well due to the fact that I got 2 reviews this is why I'm posting it now. :)

This one is dedicated to: Blaze Moonlight (again) and Ch3rryc0l4 (again!)

haha I don't own Ouran just Dani. :D

* * *

~~~Tamaki's POV~~~

"What's happening to him!?" I shouted to one of the doctors who was putting him on a different bed and trying to roll him away.

"His heart is going through to much strain. He's hyperventilating. We could lose him. Quick to the emergency room!" They ran off and I stood there shaking. I dashed out of the room and looked everywhere.

There wasn't a hallway I didn't check. Then I found what I was looking for.

"Ok, I want to know and I want to know now what you did to Kaoru." I said dangerously low after slamming Hikaru to a wall.

"Get off of me Tono." He said and shoved me off.

"WHAT THE HELL DID YOU DO TO HIM!?" I shouted and a bunch of people looked at us oddly.

"Why don't you ask HIM?" He sneered and I just noticed I was crying.

"Oh I'm sorry." I was being awfully sarcastic and snide. "I should go in the emergency room, wake him up and ask."

"...Why the hell is he in the emergency room?" He asked and crossed his arms.

"Strain on the heart and hyperventilation." I said and Hikaru shrugged.

"He'll be f-." He dropped to the floor and clutched his heart wheezing. I completely forgot I was mad at him and ran over.

"Hikaru!" I called and he looked up at me and closed his eyes.

He shoved me off and dashed off somewhere. I didn't know where.

* * *

~~~ In the emergency room~~~

"We're losing him!" One doctor shouted and they tried to restart his heart with the electricity but it stayed at that one line.

Kaoru.. Died.

"KAORU!!!" Hikaru yelled running into the room with tears streaming down his face. "KAORU I'M SORRY!!!"

"Get out of here! You can't be--" Hikaru ran over to his brother's side.

"Wake up Kaoru. Please! It's not fair Kaoru!!! WAKE UP!!" He hugged Kaoru's limp body and kissed his forehead. "Your not leaving me Kaoru. You're my other half." Hikaru grabbed Kaoru's hand and laced their fingers together. "Without you I'm not whole. Kaoru don't you understand that?"

"Sir your going to have to get out." One of the nurses said and they dragged him out of the room.

"KAORU I LOVE YOU DON'T DIE!!" He screamed as tears ran down his face.

He was brought to the waiting room where everyone else was. He started punching the walls and kicking chairs and screaming.

"SIR CALM DOWN!" A nurse yelled and Dani ran over and held Hikaru until he stopped fussing.

"DON'T TELL ME TO CALM DOWN! DO YOUR FUCKING JOB AND BRING MY BROTHER BACK TO LIFE!!" He screamed and Dani sat down with him and put him on her lap and rocked back and fourth.

"Shhh... Calm down." She had tears in her eyes also.

"S... So your saying... H...He's ... dead?" Tamaki's voice squeaked when he finished the word dead and he started crying and collapsed to the floor.

"Dani.. It's my fault." Hikaru cried into Dani and she continued to rock the full grown boy in her lap.

"Shh... Master Hikaru..." She didn't know what else to say.

* * *

~~~Hikaru's POV~~~

I'm laying in my bed. Completely empty. I didn't know hearts could ache this much. It.. It hurt so badly.

"Kaoru..." I sobbed and looked at his side of the bed. I crawled over to it and held his pillow close. It smelt like him.

Why was I so cruel?

Why am I just finding out about how I feel?

_Absence makes the heart grow fonder._

I heard Kaoru's voice say in my ear. It was soothing to hear his voice.

I couldn't sleep. I got up still holding his pillow. My legs were shaking uncontrollably. I walked to the TV and pulled out a tape and pushed it in the tape player and sat down in front of the TV.

"HAPPY BIRTHDAY HIKARU!!" I heard my mom's voice say on the tape and the younger boy smiled.

"But mommy I'm Kaoru!" Kaoru giggled cutely.

As I watched our home videos I started crying even more. My heart ached.

"Kaoru.." I whispered.

* * *

I don't even know how long I watched videos for. All I knew was I had to go to school and I still wasn't done.

School wasn't the same without my other half. I was quiet. I was shaking. I didn't want to believe he was dead but every time I turned to his desk I was disappointed to find that he wasn't in it.

The teachers went easy on me today. I wouldn't cry in school but I wouldn't talk and all I did was put my hands in my lap and look down at my desk.

A lot of girls came up to me crying and hugged me. Honestly I hated it. I don't like when people came to me crying. It made it harder to be strong.

Tamaki wasn't even hiding the fact that he was sad. I saw him a few times just walking down the hallway with that empty look. He was crying constantly.

I should be too. I'm the reason he died.

My eyes widened. I wasn't over exaggerating. It really was my fault. If it wasn't for me... Kaoru would still be alive.

I covered my mouth and collapsed onto the floor. Tears rolled down my face, onto my hand and onto the cold marble floor.

I rocked myself back and forth and suddenly I couldn't hear anything. It's like something was causing me not to hear.

A few people ran up to me and hugged me and asked me something.

I couldn't hear them. I stayed silent. I was shaking and rocking myself back and forth.

_All. Your. Fault._

_How does it feel knowing your twin brother died by your hands?_

* * *

The host club couldn't come fast enough. Of coarse we weren't really up for hosting. Especially Tamaki. I've seen his small depressed stages but this one was horrible. All he did was sit there and look out of the window.

Everyone was quiet. Honey was crying his eyes out, Mori was comforting him, he wasn't crying but he looked awfully sad. Haruhi was on the other side of the room looking out the window away from everyone. Kyoya was typing but every time he stopped it looked like he was hurting a bit more.

I was shaking and I didn't care if I'd make them all hate me. They needed to. If they didn't already...

"Guys." I said and my voice cracked and they all slowly turned to me. "...I'll tell you why he was so sad all of the time..." I fell to the ground and started to cry.

They all seemed interested. Honey calmed down on the crying. Kyoya stopped typing. Even Haruhi got up and took a seat on the couch.

"What did you do to him?" Tamaki's voice was oddly cold.

I didn't know if I could actually say it. I was in hysterics but I finally stood up with shaky legs.

"I liked Haruhi..." I started and looked at the ground but then sort of made eye contact. "And I couldn't have her..." I turned around and started pacing. "So I drank. Me and him did. I didn't know he wasn't completely drunk. I was wasted... We had sex..." I stopped pacing and looked at the floor.

I didn't know how to finish it so I pulled out my cell phone. Dani got mad at me so recorded what Kaoru said and sent it to me. My hands were shaking and I pressed play.

**"Well... The other day he got really drunk, I was only slightly buzzed... But... We... We had sex. And then in the morning he didn't remember anything and he said obviously it wasn't important if he didn't remember! And then the OTHER day we had sex when he was drunk and I was completely sober. And he moaned fucking Haruhi's name!"**

My mouth was covered as it played and then I closed the phone and started crying again.

"S....So that's why... He... He didn't like me." Haruhi stuttered and started to shake.

"That's not all.." I said and opened my phone again. I nearly dropped it. And I hit play.

**"...Hikaru your drunk." After a few seconds struggling noises were heard. "You said you wouldn't do this." **

**"Kaoru, I need this." **

**"I'm with Tamaki." More struggling. "No, I can't do this Hikaru!" **

**"Pretend its with Tamaki. After all, I'm not going to be thinking of you at all." Whimpering.**

I dropped my phone to the floor and curled in a ball and cried.

"I didn't know I said those things to him." I whimpered.

_I'm proud of you Hikaru._

Kaoru's voice said in my ears and I started crying harder.

"KAORU I'M SO SORRY!!!" I yelled and started kicking. I want him back but I knew I wasn't going to have him.

* * *

Through most of the time at the host club none of us said a word until Tamaki took in a long shaky breath.

"Well... We should plan his funeral." He said and we heard chuckling.

* * *

Awh my poor baby is dead D: T^T it's ok. I've got enough tissues for us all.


	9. Chapter 9

This is possibly THE shortest chapter. I really had nothing to say. except...

**_STOP!!! IF YOU DIDN'T WRITE A REVIEW GO BACK AND DO SO!!!_**

I want to know your thoughts on last chapter about Kaoru and why or why not you thought he did or didn't die.

Don't cheat! that's just mean :) And I want to know everyone's honest answers

Well it's been fun for the like... 5 days i've written this story.

Read my very last message at the bottom. It might make you happy ^^

* * *

"So I'm not even dead a whole DAY and you guys are all planning my funeral!" Kaoru laughed as he stood in the doorway.

"KAORU!" I yelled and stumbled to my feet and ran over to him and hugged him as tightly as I possibly could. Everyone else ran over too.

He was tackled in hugs and he was laughing.

"You guys!" He giggled. "Come on it's hard to breath with all of you hugging me like this!"

We all backed away and I started to cry again and hugged him.

"I'm so sorry. I'm so so sorry. Please forgive me. I'll do ANYTHING for you to forgive me!" I felt him slowly wrap his arms around me.

"Thank you Hikaru." He said tenderly and I pulled away and looked at him shocked.

"What do you mean thank you?" I asked and he smiled and kissed my cheek.

"You're the reason why I'm ok." Kaoru admitted and I looked extremely lost.

"What?" I asked and he smiled at me again.

"You ran into the emergency room when they lost me. And you were screaming and crying. Then when they brought you to the waiting room.. You told them to do their job and bring me back. They told me when I woke up. They said they've never heard anyone use those metaphors before. Saying something about you're my other half and with me your whole. They did all they could to get me to breath again after that. When they got me breathing they didn't tell you because they didn't know if it was going to last. So all yesterday and today they made sure I was ok enough to leave. And finally I was." Kaoru smiled cutely and my mouth dropped. I hugged him again.

"Kaoru, don't scare me like that again. When you died a part of me did too. I was so scared you can't scare me like that again, ok?"

* * *

~~~Kaoru's POV~~~

I looked up at my older brother and closed my eyes as he held me close. For once I was all he wanted. For once he wasn't thinking of Haruhi. It was me he wanted. It was me he'd get. I love my brother more than anything in the world. I'm not saying that I'm not going to make him bend head over heels for me to forgive him completely but I've never been so close to someone ever.

"I promise." I finally said and continued being in his arms. That's all I wanted.

"...Your forgiving him after everything he did?" Haruhi asked kind of monotonish. I pulled away from Hikaru shocked.

"You told them?" I asked and Hikaru sighed.

"Yeah I did." He looked away sadly.

"Hikaru." I said and he turned to me confused. "I didn't tell them because I didn't want them to hate you." I admitted.

"I told them because I WANTED them to hate me." He said and I hugged him.

"I love you." I said immediately.

"I love you too... Kaoru." He said tenderly and I smiled.

It was me he wanted now. Not Haruhi. Me. I could've cried at that moment but I felt arms wrap around my waist from behind me.

"I'm so glad your ok." Tamaki said silkily and I let go of Hikaru without thinking and turned and hugged Tamaki. "I was so worried."

"It's ok. I'm here now." I said happily as he cuddled into the crook of my neck and gave a very light tender kiss.

"I'm so glad your ok."

"KAO-KUN!!!" Honey cried and ran over to me and hugged me tightly. "I WAS SO SAD AND SCARED!"

"I'm sorry Honey-senpai." I giggled as I consoled Honey for a few moments and then Mori walked over and had to peel him off of me for my own comfort.

I walked over To Haruhi. I just stared at her. She was cute, but honestly I didn't see why Hikaru was head over heels.

We stared at each other until she broke the foot we had between us and hugged me tight.

"It's good to know your ok." She said and I smiled and hugged back.

"I'm sorry for everything Haruhi." I said and she looked at me and smiled.

"It's ok." She said softly and we pulled away. I looked at Kyoya who was oddly not near any one of his electronic devices.

"...I don't get a hug?" He asked and I blinked in a surprised manner. I didn't expect that.

I walked over and hugged him. He hugged back.

_I am loved. It's not that none of them hated me. It's I was to blind to see that they cared even the slightest._

* * *

I was sitting in-between Tamaki and Hikaru. Neither of them wanted to let me go. It made me laugh. I love them.

"Kaoru. Do you think I could talk to you for a second in private?" Tamaki asked and I looked up.

"Yeah Tono-senpai. Of coarse." I followed him to the other side of the room. People saw us but didn't know what we were saying.

"Listen, I know you love Hikaru and all. I'm really pissed off at what he did to you but I know how much he means to you. Do you want to break up?" Tamaki asked and my mouth dropped a bit as I looked at his calm smiling face. His hair covered one of his gorgeous blue eyes and I was dazzled by them.

I looked down and grabbed his hands. I looked up and kissed him tenderly.

"It it was ok with you, I haven't had my complete share of you yet." I flashed him a seductive look and he blushed a bit and laughed and let go of my hands and cupped my face and kissed me.

"Very well. Would you like to sleep over today?" Tamaki asked and I smiled up at him.

"I'll be at your house at 6." I promised and he hugged me tightly.

"I'll make it a night to remember mon amour." Tamaki whispered gently and we walked back to the populated side of the room. The second I sat down Hikaru grabbed my hand and cuddled against me. I looked over at him and smiled.

This is what I've wanted for so long.

_Hikaru._

He kissed my cheek. I was finally happy. I was around all of my friends who loved me and cared about me.

I looked down at mine and Hikaru's hands. We were holding hands. It looked like a mirrored image of the same hand.

Me and Hikaru completed each other. Like yin and yang. Salt and pepper. Peanut butter and jelly.

But most of all we were Kaoru and Hikaru.

We were my new favorite word.

We were _identical._

If Hikaru ever needs me, I'll be there for him. And he'll be there for me. I love my twin brother. I really really do.

* * *

Ok. I don't want this story to end as much as you guys do. SO I was thinking. *grins cutely* I want at _least _10 reviews telling me why I should continue the story.

Or if you guys hated it 10 people telling me why I should discontinue the story. (and you can't say it was to corny because that was a given)

I already have planned what I want next. so why don't you guys help me out and tell me what to do. ^^

Start typing! 3


	10. Sequel?

The well asked for sequel to Identical. If you liked the ending to the other one then just go back and forget this story even exists. But if not then come on in. The story is waiting for you!!

Like before this one is going to be in first person because that's how I like writing stories. So if it gets confusing I apologize. Most of it is in Hikaru's POV and how he feels with his brother dating Tamaki

Sneak Peek of **Broken Mirror**!

_"Kaoru, you look so cute when you blush at my words." Tamaki whispered and Kaoru shivered as Tamaki pressed his lips to Kaoru's._

_The girls around them went crazy. They were squealing and giggling._

_"It's much cuter than the brotherly love act he did with Hikaru!" My heart dropped._

_"Yeah much cuter! The king and the nice twin!" I looked straight ahead of myself and covered my mouth. Kaoru truly was gone. Tamaki took my brother away.  
_

The funny thing is this one is a lot happier than the last one (I think. o.0)

Well. I don't know when I'll put up the chapters (since I've written a good amount of them) But until then, ja ne! 3


End file.
